I Talk Sometimes - Kendo

I'm holding my shinai (kendo stick) and was headed towards the lounge, when my R.A. comes up.
R.A. - "Do you just carry that around all the time?"
Me - "Nah, I'm just gonna go practice, so I can cut up some... Indians"
R.A. - "Uhhh, I'm not gonna ask what prompted that response"
Me - "It was the first race I could come up with. Don't wanna seem unracist now. I'm a man"

Ugh, Asians

So I was studying in my room, when my friend all of sudden calls me at 8PM-ish, and she's says:
"Hey, are you at Wave [for Asian Idol]?"
Shit, I forgot
"Umm... Yes?"

Ah, yes... Asian Idol. The singing sensation that is a result of a joint collaboration of every Asian club (CSA, JSA, TSA, KSA, and any other SA's - SA being 'S'tudent 'A'ssociation) singing their favourite Asian hits, or just straight up any song to their liking. Moreover, one of my other friends (acquaintance?) was a finalist for this event, and told us all to come out and support her.

I did not care for this event (nor will I care for future such events), but whatever, I paid $5 already in advance, so I was obligated to go. I put on my Poker jacket and headed off to The Wave, where the event was being held.

I go there, and, as to quote my roommate "this is some'ol bullshit". Yep, Asians singing some Kelly Clarkson, maybe a Disney song, and a plethora of Asian artists I may have heard of at one point, but who's names I will never remember. Did not hold my interest. Not for a bit. After the first artist was done singing, I tried to call up my friend, but to no avail, due to the cacophony orchestrated by the audience. I ended up hovering around the back of the crowd, calling up other people to share my lament. I made remarks such as:

"Hey, I'm calling you because I'm watching Asian idol and I need some entertainment"
"I should have brought a book"
"If I wanted to see Asians sing, I'd go home and go karaoke with my friends."

My acquaintance eventually does her performance singing some overplayed Chinese (I think originally Japanese) song I've heard of before, while I was still chattering away on the phone ("Ugh, I hate Asians" may have been something I said). I was able to locate my friend, who was holding a sign supporting the acquaintance. We talked, I complained, and then she said something that infuriated me.

"After this, there's going to be another round of singing for those who advanced the first round."
"WHAT?!"

After coming back from Asian Idol, I did some reflecting. First of all, I will never go to another such event. And second of all, I don't hate Asians. Much of who I am is due to Asian influence, as well as western (not the school) influences. No, I just hate a very specific group in which I am yet to accurately define.

Japanese People Gave me Food/HOLY CRAP I BOUGHT A BOOK

YESTERDAY, free sushi. My friend from behind Huron led me and other Japanese people to the bus that led us to the free food. One of the Japanese guy's (FROM JAPAN) last name literally translates to tree-mountain. We had a delightful conversation about dangerous Canada is, raining skis and beavers, how Asian people have no eyes (in reference to Russell Peters) and living in mountains.

I went there, ate an assload of food, met some more people whose names I will never remember. One person said she would get me drunk and high on my birthday. Then a nice white man drove us home while listening to Japanese Madonna. Will I put in more detail to this post? No.


TODAY, I went over to the UWO book store in my free time. This was on the shelf for 25% off:



I bought it. I went out of my way to tell people this was the first book I've ever bought (for myself anyway). People were proud of me.

Got'cha pt.2

(Read the post before this for the rules of Got'cha)

This game is FUCKIN INTENSE.

I went over to someone's room on my floor to ask for some chemistry homework help, when all of a sudden that girl who's iPod I lost came into the room was asking people for reinforcements. Her friend was apparently trapped in the washroom because 3 douchebags with with bandanna's covering their faces (one had a pink pashmina) was stalking her. People being harassed in the washroom over a stupid game? I gotta see this.

So I get there and there they were: girl trapped in washroom, and 3 people with hoodies, shit covering their mouths, and aviator glasses (terrorists). Naturally, I went into the girl's washroom. We ended up plotting to get this girl back into her room, which was right across from the washroom. One of the people on her floor ended up getting about 13-16 girls to come into the washroom, one of which who said "YEAH, WE'LL SHOW THEM, GIRL POWER" to which I replied "YEAAAH!!". So that's what we did, and now she's stuck in her room.

People take this game way to seriously. Good thing it ends tomorrow. The terrorists were all like "we're aloud to use force to pull her out of the washroom/her room". No. This game does not grant you a license to sexual harass/rape. Who do you think you are? James Bondage? I'm glad I got out the first day, or I would have done some crazy things I would regret.

Who am I kidding? I'd love to win that $500. Fuck, why did I speedwalk.

Got'cha!!!!

Bah, what the FUCK!

So each res at Western plays this game called “Got’cha”. How do you play? Everyone (who paid) is given a picture of someone in the building, and a rubber ball. All you have to do is find the person in this picture, touch them with the ball, and say “GOT’CHA”. After that, the person who was caught must surrender the picture of the person they were suppose to find (and every other picture they have on them if they caught someone else), and give it to the person who caught them, who now continues to get more people.

To sum things up: I have picture, that man is on my picture. Me touch man with ball, say “got’cha”. Man give me picture. If man caught other people beforehand, he give me picture as well. If bad man touch me with ball, I kick him nuts, and give him pictures.

My plan was hide, and hopefully by then my person will have accumulated enough pictures for me to take.

Day 1 I’m out. Of course, being Asian, I was already at a disadvantage (1250 students in the building, maybe like, 50 Asians, and they’re all probably reading in their room or preparing cheap goods which will be sold at a higher price in foreign markets).

How’d I get caught? I went to the cafeteria (which is out of bounds for people to catch you. Other places out of bounds are your own room and a classroom/lecture hall. I was waiting in line to pay for my sandwich, when this douche with a touque and aviator glasses stares me down. I’m all like “oh shit”, and head towards the exit, and speed walk outta there. THAT was my mistake. What the fuck? Speed walking? Unsurprisingly he caught me whilst I was in the elevator, and I gave him the picture I kept on me, which he put in his wallet with his other 3. Interesting thing about those other pictures: THEY WERE LIKE, ALL ASIAN. I hope this kid wins. Next time I’ll bleach my skin.

Little Post #2

Little post today:

1) I wanted to test the merits of deodorant, so I went to the gym with deodorant on only one armpit. It works.

2) I played dodgeball and got hit in the face.

3) My face hurts.

YES WE CAN

Stayed up to watch the speech. Time well spent. Gave me some inspiration. One day his victory will benefit me. (That picture is my desktop background.)

Little Post #1 (RENAMED FOR CONTINUITY)

Little post today.

1) While coming back from lecture, I saw a guy on a motorcycle. His helmet either:

• Had hairs stuck on top of it
• had a little slot on the top for him to slide his mohawk through it.

Either way, it was badass

2) My prof gave us all Fiber One bars for class. I made sure I took two because:

1. They taste good
2. I like hanging out in public stalls

3) http://www.crunchyroll.com/media-475190/Fist-of-the-North-Star-Episode-1.html
I woke up this morning and one of my forums linked me here. FIRST EPISODE OF FIRST OF THE NORTH STAR! WATAAA! I skimmed through it, mainly towards the end when the fighting took place.

• YATATATATATATA
• You're already dead
  

Indoor Haunted House-ish Thing

Today, I went to the UCC at 10PM with my friends because they wanted to go to the haunted house thing. Once the bitches showed up at 10:20PM, we went in. The people that I went in with had the pretense that I was some balls of steel type of guy, mainly because I didn't shriek like a little girl seeing the Jonas Brothers being murdered by Miley Cirusm at the mere thought of entering the haunted house thing. Nevertheless, I went in, leading of course. My verdict? It was alright. Pretty neat ideas, having someone in a cloak follow you around, a room with a locked door - although to the locked door's detriment, we were kept in the room for too long, so the ring-girl in there lost it's shock appeal, and it seemed like we were hanging out. Nevertheless, having anticipated everything that happened (except for the guy which I will mention later), it was alright.

Oh, and I LOVED this one guy (not gay, keep reading) that was in the front of the haunted house. You walk into the haunted house, and this guy jumps out at you and is like "RAAAAWR!!... YOU ARE GOING... THE WRONG WAY... TAKE THE LEFT ENTRANCE..." That was the highlight of the haunted house. I don't care if it wasn't scary, that guy kept me thoroughly amused. I stood outside the haunted house for a while a little more so I could hear this guy.

OH SHIT, SNOW!

Ah, first day of snow in London (yesterday doesn't count because I wasn't outside when it snowed, fuck off). Nothing much to say about it; it's purdy, it's a bitch to walk in. Nevertheless, the first snow day granted me the perfect opportunity to heckle at the American on my floor:

"HOW DO YOU LIKE OUR WEATHER, YOU DAMN AMERICAN?"
"THIS IS CANADA SAYING FUCK YOU"
"WHY DON'T YOU GO SHOVEL A DRIVEWAY, ASSHOLE"

To which he replied "Why is it snowing in October?"

Perfectly valid question, but I'm not answering it (damn American).

**Disclaimer: If you are an American reading this blog, don't kick my ass please.

Having a shirt on is the business

Today, I went to Sommerville House to participate in a study about the relationship between the coordination of the hand with and or without the guidance of the eye, hence the study of the motor systems within the hand, or something like that. After they said I'd get a free Western t-shirt, I kind of blanked-out. I get in there, the lady says hi, and explains the whole test. Basically, they hook up your index finger with a wire, put that hand on a table, covered by a screen, and white dots will pop up on the screen. You move your index finger, and try to place your finger on the dot, the 90 degrees clockwise of the dot, etc., then repeat with your other hand.

So I get my free t-shirt, and it's the shitty cheap ones, but pretty much what I was expecting. Being paid in cloth is awesome, although if I were in a third world country, I would probably die of starvation - but I'd be the sharpest looking corpse.

Ack, I been found out

There was a happy point in my life where my sister did not know about this blog. I will cherish those memories.

P.S. Fuck off
P.P.S - Love you =)

I Talk Sometimes - Water

I was in the hallway filling my former jam jar with water. I was stopped 3 times, each time people asked "hey, what's in the jar?". I respond "Water. Would you like some?" To which they respond "No thx". Then we stand silently, until I saw "well, better get this jar of water back to my room." This isn't really different from how I normally conduct conversations, but doing this in rapid succession made it apparent to me that I just have a knack for stirring up awkward conversation. That, or I'm just an ass trying to end this conversation quickly so I can get back to my room. Regardless, the end result is the same - some crazy Asian guy is filling up jars of water, probably mailing it back to his home.

I'm good for it

So a while ago I lost my iPod. Last weeks ago I lost my friend's (or more accurately, person who lives in the room next to me) iPod. This week I told her that I lost said iPod, telling her I lost it this weekend. It's funny that my parents told me "You have to pay her back, BUT DON'T TELL HER YOU LOST IT LAST WEEK, TELL HER THIS WEEK." A good lesson - glorify your fuckery. If I'm going down, it's going to be in the most spectacular manner, or so people will believe. Anyways, I told them this, to which she told me her brother will convey the price of the iPod to me. I gave them (her and her roommate) some fried rice (which I just happened to have in my stash of stuff I brought from home) out of goodwill, then I left. That is how you show Asians RESPECT.

So after I leave, her roommate comes in here and was like "omg, you made her cry. her brother bought her that iPod, etc." Of course, I figured she was lying (poker instincts kick in), but I went over there to check it out. So once I walk in there, there was silence, then some sad music started playing in the background. WTF? To which afterwards, the girl broke out into laughter. Nice try guys. I'll pay you back soon, just keep cool. Gotta get me an iPod/Zune right afterwards.

Green Tea

I slept under 6 hours yesterday, so I needed a little caffeine to get me going for my 5 hours of lectures and tutorials today. I figured, hey, let's try some green tea, that's got caffeine, AND it's good for you! To pay for my good health, I fell asleep in 2 of my lectures today. I'd rather be an awake fatty than a sedated 120 year-old eating carrot sticks.

Poutine > Chicken Fingers

Today I went to the Spoke for lunch. I figured I'd get some poutine before my next class. So I ordered the poutine and ended up waiting in line for a good 4-ish minutes. They were still frying up the fries, so other people got their orders before I did. I got a little antsy waiting. Soon after, they had finished preparing chicken fingers and fries on a plate. They must've figured it was my order, as did the people in line as they gestured for me to get it. I was thinking "well, this is probably heathier than poutine, and it apparently costs more. And fuck you guys for making me wait," so I took the chicken figures - a decision I immediately regretted. The chicken was so dry and I was so thirsty. The chicken was also pretty hard and crunchy on the outside. I'm pretty sure that son of a bitch'en cut my mouth. Why did I turn my back on the poutine?

Moral of this story: don't turn back on you're trusted friend for chicken.

Emo in My Lungs

I came up with this phrase with my friend. Feel free to use it. Also, this may turn into a blog.