LAST NIGHT
I'm studying at Taylor (a library for those of you not in the know). I find myself quite occupied with 2 midterms and 3 papers, due dates scattered throughout the week, stressing over the limited time I have to complete my tasks, regretting not starting earlier, worrying about diminishing averages and grad school admittance.
I get a call from my American friend "Yo, Haunted Forest"
So I go to the Haunted Forest with some friends (a charity-raising-Halloween-based event in a forest, for those of you not in the know). We waited in line, singing some songs. I taught them lyrics to a song another friend of mine came up with about a romantic encounter with a girl he met on the bus, but alas, their paths have failed to align since that fateful day.
"Girl I met on the buuuuuuuus~You're so fiiiiiine~ (So fresh)You're so fresshhhhhh~ (So fine)"
There's probably more lyrics.
The line drew to an end, and lo and behold, we were in the Haunted Forest! The back story behind the haunted forest was, some student went missing in the forest and died, and she was wearing a white dress (IMPORTANT). They found her and brought her to the mortuary, but then SHE DISAPPEARED. She was then seen just hanging out in the creak, snatching your people up, trying to drown them so you better hide your kids, hide your wife, because she's drowning everybody up in here.
We entered in with two other groups to form. The ladies that were ahead of us were just horrified with everything the forest had to offer. I stepped on a branch behind them and they screamed. It was awesome.
Throughout the forest, people dressed up in silly little costumes would jump out at you. We were at the back of the group, so we only got see the people in front of us get scared, which was fine, given that the ladies with panphobia were in front of us. There was one jumper that was particularly good.
Early on in this haunted forest promenade, a guy dressed up as a werewolf bursted out of the woods and scared the people in front of us. I walked by him, and I was like "Mmmm, well played, wolfman" in a fine Victorian accent, and we continued our walk. I don't think he was too impressed, perhaps even insulted. The classy wolfman disappeared back into the woods.
We continued our walk, when one of the terror-stricken ladies in front of us yelled "THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE BUSHES!"
THE SAME WEREWOLF popped out again and he jumped out at us. Of course, we saw him coming a mile away thanks to the fine ladies in front of us, but the effort in going all that way to scare the assholes who were not unnerved in the slightest, to commit to your wolf-like duties to render all those aghast on this dark hour, I truly meant it when I uttered the words "Mmmm, well-played, wolfman" a second time.
My artistic rendition of the Wolf Man drinking tea
There were some other cool things in the woods.
There was a blinding strobe light in the middle of the forest, and I was thinking "There goes my night vision, some guy is probably gonna jump us after, I should probably close my eyes to try to preserve it". As soon as I do that, girl in front of us yells. THERE WAS A DUDE BEHIND THE LIGHT THE WHOLE TIME! BRILLIANT!
We walk a little further down, and some guy jumps out at us... WITH A CHAINSAW! I found out later that that was an actual chainsaw, with the chain removed. Pretty neat.
Of course, the lady with the white dress (IMPORTANT) pops up, makes the girls in front of us howl in fright, and then proceeds to laugh at them. Dead people are trolls.
Shoutouts to the wolfman, for justifying my waste of time. Now back to work.
